Wednesday, January 05, 2011
I was reading my Walt Disney World Trivia Book the other day, when I came across this item:
Did you know? The world-famous turkey legs sold throughout WDW come from 40-50lb. turkeys. Each leg weighs 1.5lbs.
Whoa. Now, I’m no expert here, but I’ve baked, deep fat fried, (and other things I’m not allowed to mention on the grounds I may incriminate myself) 19 turkeys for various Thanksgivings and once July when I got one as a going away present. My roaster maxes out at a 21lb. bird and my deep fat fryer can requires a shoehorn for a bird larger than 19lbs.
I can’t even begin to fathom a 40-50lb. turkey. I tried googling “giant turkey” but all I got was this:
Giant turkeys are turkeys that have mutated into ravenous creatures…with a Bleed Attack capability…
Sure, giant mutant turkeys are shocking. But here’s the kicker: Thighs are dark meat. Everyone knows the tender, white breast meat is best. Where is that stuff going?
I imagine myself at Disney World (actually, I imagine this a lot in hopes it will someday become reality), and I’m feeling peckish. The enormous turkey legs smell good and sure, they have their own handle – making them easier to eat. But what if I want white meat?
There really is no place to buy a breast there, right? And if the legs are 1.5 pounds, how big is a giant turkey breast? 20 pounds maybe? So I’d need both hands to carry it.
And let’s not forget condiments like cheese and mayo. Now, we have a real issue here.
At least, that’s what I think.
The Turkey Assassin